My grandmother used to say that how you spent New Year’s Day was how you would spend the whole year. I think she was telling me in her not-so-subtle manner to avoid drinking myself into a January 1st hangover. As I approach the half century mark, I’m happy to say that those days are long behind me.

As are the days of this awesome song and video*. Twenty freaking years worth of days!

It seems like yesterday that I was putting this new song on a mixtape for my upcoming 30th birthday celebration. I was definitely enjoying carefree times with my friends without really thinking much beyond the present moment of fun. I was focusing on my career but not so much my family; there was plenty of time for grown-up things like that.

So many things can change in the two decades that feel like forever ago, yet also feel just like yesterday.

In 1996 I was still very much an immature kid trying to navigate my way through the end of my twenties. Now I am trying to help guide my daughter through the sometimes turbulent teenage years. How did I become the adult in the room? Did I miss that class? Why does her stuff dredge up my stuff that was buried back in a virtual time capsule?

Lots more questions (and nostalgia) fill my brain.

Including important ones like:

“Wait, is that Courtney Cox in the Counting Crows video?” “How did she go from Dancing in the Dark with the Boss in 1984 to dating Adam Duritz a dozen years later?” “What did she look like in the Springsteen video? It’s been so long since I’ve seen it.” “In 1984 I was a junior in High School – the same age my daughter is now. How did THAT happen?”

“You sit around getting older
There’s a joke here somewhere and it’s on me
I’ll shake this world off my shoulders
Come on baby this laugh’s on me”

2016 was a harsh reminder that so much can change in the blink of an eye.

Much of this year seemed to be spent in an 80’s playback reel as we sadly marked the passing of so many of our generation’s icons. I know that I was transported back to my younger self many times this year as the soundtrack to my generation played in tribute.

We lost so many who connected us to our past and our dreams of bright futures ahead. As GenXers, we mourned the end of our youth – especially as the oldest in our cohort hit the big 5-0.

It was a sad year.

It was a strange year.

And the most surreal part, this guy is somehow the president. That’s right. While Courtney was dancing with Bruce, The Donald was just becoming a household name for his brash style. Making a name for himself by “getting what he wants”. Sigh.

And a lot of us are just not sure what to do right now.

How do we grieve our past while still moving optimistically into the future?

How do we channel our post-election anxiety into positive action?

How do we keep moving forward through the chaos and negativity?

I’m not exactly sure.

But I do know that it’s important for me to keep being fully present in my everyday life. Be the best person that I can for the people who matter the most to me. Do my part to make the world a better place. Stand up for injustice. Speak up for those who can’t.

If 2016 taught us anything, it’s critical to show up. To spread love instead of hate.

Make genuine connections with actual people and get to know each other better. Find common ground.

It’s also vital to celebrate the moments big and small. We don’t get the time back.

As the holiday season winds down, I find myself contemplating the traditions that bring joy and connect me to my past as I embrace new ones that reflect changing times.

I got goosebumps as I watched fireworks explode over the City of Brotherly Love – especially when they played the Star Wars theme to honor Carrie Fisher.

I let out big shouts of pride as LGBT, Trinidadian, Asian and Mexican groups marched by as part of this year’s Mummers parade. Sometimes changes comes slowly, but it’s important to keep pushing for it.

And here’s another positive change – when I arrived at my parents house later in the day, they turned off their TV and we had really good conversations about a wide variety of topics – including the usually avoided one – politics.

My grandmother (who would have been entering her 100th year if she were still with us) would be happy to know that 2017 is off to a promising start!

“And it’s been a long December and there’s reason to believe
Maybe this year will be better than the last
I can’t remember all the times I tried to tell myself
To hold on to these moments as they pass”

*And yes favorite sister, you have to watch the video, even if you hate his whiny voice.